Sunday, April 29, 2012

March part I

DADDY:
The following is something that was layed on my heart this month in the form of a poem:

The Day I Met Nathaniel Ethan

I met my son the other day, and an undescribable Joy overwhelmed me
The doctors say he has half a heart,
But they don't know that You work to completion,
and have known Nathan from before the start.
As the measure of my faith is put to the test,
I stand on Your promises, and lean on Your everlasting arms for rest.
They ask me how I'm doing, they say "I'm sorry" and that they will pray.
Yet when I open my mouthto speak, they're preplexed by what I have to say.
I have a Joy thats unspeakable and a peace that's beyond all understanding,
I have You to thank oh my Lord, because it's by Your wounds we have healing.
God, You've revealed to me what Nathan will accomplish for Your glory
With a beginning testimony like his, I know his life is going to be quite a story.
Father I thank You for my son,
I have the authority to speak life into him, because on the cross You said it is done.
In the name of Jesus, nothing missing, nothing broken...

"In Christ alone, my hope is found,
He is my Light, my Strength, my Song...
What Heights of LOVE, what DEPTHS OF PEACE
when fears are STILLED, when strivings CEASE, my COMFORTER, my ALL IN ALL
here in the LOVE of Christ I STAND!"




MOMMY:
March was another busy month.
The first part of the month we were instructed to meet with a Genetic Counselor to talk about different tests we can run. During the conversation with her we also went through all of our family history and genetics to see if we could determine what caused all of this. We were unable to find anywhere in our family histories or genetics that would cause this. Right after meeting with the GC we went in for an ultrasound, they said this would be a common occurance now, with a meeting with the Perinatologist to follow all of the other parts of Nathan. We were told that with this heart condition they usually see either missing or misplaced organs in the rest of the body. When the ultrasound was complete they said that as far as they could tell all the organs were where they belonged. Then they said that they noticed he only had a two vessel umbelical cord not a three vessel cord like normal babies they assured us it is common but it could be a sign of Downsyndrome (if he has DS they said they would not do surgery because those babies usually don't survive this kind of surgery). After the Perinatologist left the Genetic Counselor came back in and said by the way our boy is growing she highly doubts that he has DS. The possibility of all of this upset me. I was trying to hold back the tears as we left the hospital that day and the 24 hours that followed. I know my God is BIGGER than this and He can reach down whenever He wants and make Nathan whole. My down fall is I am trying to "prepare" myself for the worst when what I need to be doing is focus on TODAY and what I have and be thankful that I get to enjoy everything I have right now. Thank you Lord. A few days later a lady from church asked me for an update because she remembered that I had an appointment earlier in the week. I told her about what the doctor had said about the two vessel cord and how they say it can be a sign for DS. She looked at me with her six month old son on her lap and said he had a two vessel cord and the doctors never said anything to her about the chances of that. That little bit of information from her helped me recharge. Because I was struggling with that information I believe God sent her to me at that moment to calm my fears. Talking with another friend she said I sounded "full of hope" for someone going through a situation like ours when most people would be so full of dispair. All I could say was "God's got it."

One day I was getting ready to leave for the grocery store with our two children and suddenly a song came to me the words were "There are days when I feel, The best of me is ready to begin, Then there're days when I feel, I'm letting go and soaring on the wind, Cause I've learned in laughter or in pain, How to survive, I get on my knees, I get on my knees, There I am before the love that changes me, See I don't know how but there's power, When I'm on my knees," and it goes on to talk about you can do it anywhere crowded  places or alone. I walked to the middle of my living room and hit my knees in the middle of the floor and asked God to perform a miracle.

About midmonth we had a follow-up with the Pediatric Cardiologist. The doctor said we looked much better this time around seeing as how I wasn't crying uncontrolably. We told him we had a good support system between the Lord and all of our friends and family. He told us they had discovered that the veins that take the blood from the lungs back to the heart to be sent to the rest of the body were not working. This means that instead of being able to wait a few days to do surgery they would have to do it within hours of him being born and he would be in a by-pass machine. This, as I'm sure you can imagine, almost sent me back to the feelings of the first day. The doctor assured me that he was pretty sure there were no other defects to worry about that surgery should go as planned and he would be fine. I had a question I needed answered, how many surgeries like this do the surgens do? The PC said that obviously they don't do this everyday because not everyday there is a baby with this issue but they have done many of these procedures with great success stories. He told us he wants us to meet the Neonatologists who are the people that will be taking Nathan into surgery when he is born and we would arrange a date for that at a later time. I pray that even if we meet them that when the time comes we won't need them because he is healed. Although we got reassured by the PC I left feeling defeated and angry. I just wanted to go in look at the monitor and see that he was healed. I just want him better. I am so tired of stressing while trying to take care of myself and my family, but I know that God doesn't give you more than you can handle and apparently He knows I am strong enough to handle this.

Sunday, April 22, 2012

February

FEBRUARY 2012

Daddy:
Being a man, finding out that your son has not just one, but many incredible heart deffects is something that will put things into perspective REAL quick. Before we got the news Missy and I were focused on our family, youth group ministry, and getting things ready to claim our new house in Jesus' name (another miracle), but something like this gets your attention on whats really important. Once we got the news that Friday, many questions, thoughts and fears arose. After immediately calling pastors, family and friends and getting our little man on the pray chains. We spent that evening with some very close personal friends, whom I thank God for every day. Through talking with them, they told us that we needed to find a name for our little man, so we could BOLDLY bring him before the Lord daily. While at our friends house, I get a call from my mom, checking on how I was doing, if there was anything we needed that she could do. She too, also advised me that I needed to name my son so we could bring him before the Lord. It was clear that God wanted this son of His named, and as his earthly father I did not take the job lightly. After looking online at list after list of names and meanings of those names, I felt there was only one choice, being led by the Holy Spirit I came up with Nathaniel Ethan. It wasn't a big crowd pleaser at first, seeing how my son's initials would be N.E.W., after much prayer we knew that this was God's name He had chosen for our son.

After leaving our friends house, we went home and went to bed, it had been quite a day. With our other two children staying at their Auntie's house, our home was very quiet, and between that, and the news we were digesting neither Missy or I really got too much sleep. I got up early that next morning, Saturday, and awoke to an email from my close friend, calling all the men in our men's group to prayer. Needless to say that this particular email drove me to tears. So weeping like a small boy, I opened my bible and to study the verses that were in this email. Upon studying those I found many other verses that really spoke to me in a deep way. Feeling like I could do nothing else, I began to write, something I used to love doing, but haven't found myself doing lately. What I didn't know is that what I would write, would inspire people, and act as a "prayer cloth" for my son.


NATHANIEL ETHAN WATKINS

Nathaniel- Gift of God

Ethan- Strong and optimistic
Solid and enduring
Permanent
Firm

N.E.W. - 2 Corinthians 5:17- The old is gone, the new is come, we are made brand new!

John 10:10- Life abundantly. Nathan has this promise.

1 Peter 2:24
Exodus 15:26
Psalms 118:17
Psalms 139:13-14
Jeremiah 1:5
Psalms 103:1-3


Mommy:
The month of February brought many emotions for us. We were scared, shocked, quizzitive, but we
knew all the answers for all of these emotions could be found by reading our Bibles and being in constant prayer. We found out on a Friday and were at church first thing Sunday morning. I was nervous. I had finally come to grips a little with the news as long as people were not asking me a million questions and telling me they were "sorry." My husband and friends advised that we stay home but we knew we needed to be there. Everything went surprisingly well. We were able to show where our faith really lay by not letting this get us down and being there to worship and praise the Lord for what the future held for us. Within days we were talking with family and friends about our faith and how we know God can heal and we just have to believe and trust in Him. Just five days after I was in such peace that people were asking me if I was wearing a fake smile. All I can say is when you have something this BIG come up in your life you realize there are bigger forces at work for you and you have to realize that you don't have control over it but God does and He knows what is best for you and your family. He takes you through things to teach you and others about His love for you. By giving the situation to Him and saying He is in control He blessed us with "Joy Unspeakable." We are smiling because we know that through this we will be able to touch more people and speak to more people and share with them our Hope and others don't understand how we can be smiling. I had been so excited about what the Lord was doing and is going to do through this that I was even talking to bill collectors about it on the phone, saying "sorry I havn't been able to call and pay you, we have been in a lot of doctors appointments because they say our little guy has a serious heart defect, but God's going to take care of it and it will all be ok." They probably thought I was nuts but thats the joy I have. Also within five days we had 13 churches from Washington, Idaho, and California praying for us. By the end of February we also had churches in Alaska, South Carolina, and Arizona also praying.

About a week after finding out about Nathaniel I was listening to our local Christian radio station and a song came on that struck me to the core. The words were "I will praise you in this storm, and I will lift my hands, that you are who You are, no matter where I am, every tear I've cried You hold in Your hand, You've never left my side, though my heart is torn, I will praise You in this storm." I felt I was being spoken to through this. I felt it saying God has it all under control, just keep prasing Him for all He has done and all that He is going to do through this, all the people you will get to speak to, He knows your hurting but He is holding you and the situation you are in no matter what you are going through. This gave me a peace. HE'S GOT IT!! 


With God ALL things are possible!!

Friday, April 20, 2012

Welcome all!!

First off we would like to thank everyone for taking time to stop by and check out our blog.

My husband and I live in Washington state and have two beautiful children Adrian (3years) and Elisha (14months).  Now let me tell you a little about the reason we are here. In February 2012 we went in for a routine mid-pregnancy ultrasound for our 3rd child. A few hours after the ultrasound we were contacted by our midwife telling us to go directly to the hospital as they had found a serious heart defect in our little man. After two and a half hours in the Pediatric Cardiologist office getting all sorts of ultrasounds and cardiograms we got the news that our little man (to simplify it) has half a heart that is turned the wrong way, tilted the wrong way, and there are major veins and arteries missing. According to the doctors he can live but not without multiple surgeries starting from the time he is born. As you can imagine we were in shock. However, we believe in God and we know that He still preforms miracles. We immidiatly informed our Pastor of what was going on and he went to work getting us on all of the prayer chains in the area.After word had spread within three weeks we had churches in seven different states praying for us. It was very humbling to know that people we don't know all over the country are praying and believing with us that our little man will be healed.


With all of the people we have contacting us asking us updates we thought it would be easiest to start a blog so that everyone who wanted to keep up on his progress could follow us. It is our hope that our story can inspire, encourage, give hope, and most of all increase faith.

Upcoming posts will up date you in more detail on what happened in February and March and get you up to date where we hope to continue to post weekly if not sooner. Thank you.

God Bless.